January 2, 2019

Welcome to 2019! (Got that right on the first try and I'm very proud of myself.)

I've stared at this blinking cursor for way to long today. In spite of the new year, old fears hang on like the last dregs of sleep. What do I say that hasn't already been said? Will it sound cliche? Stupid? Is anybody reading? 

We set goals because everyone loves a new page, a clean slate, but the second many of us stumble, we give up. Anxiety continues to swallow our words, one slice of cake turns into two, and instead of reading we sit through a full season of that show we know so well we can quote it (not guilty, I swear).

My good friend Sharon M. Peterson, is currently working on an amazing story about a young woman who creates a list of...

December 25, 2018

December 12, 2018

Hello, Wednesday Warriors!

With the holidays coming up, I have sweets on the brain! Or really, food in general. This is one of my most favorite times of the year. Not only because I get to see a lot of loved ones, but also the food. So. Much. Glorious. Food!

Wether it's sweet, spicy, crunchy, or soft there is something about themed meals that make them extra fun. Nostalgia draws us back, fills us with the warm glow of memories. I grew up making frosted Christmas cookies with my mom. Half the time I'd burry the snowmen, reindeer, angels, or Santas in glitter or sprinkles. They were never pretty, but they always tasted delicious and gave me a few hours of messy goodness with my mom and brother.

On the spicier side, my mom al...

December 10, 2018

In the novel I'm querying, one of the characters defines things in order to gain control over them. Being the word nerd that I am, I thought it would be fun to share a definition once a week in honor of Cal.

Thanks Kelsey Quick for the amazing artwork!

December 5, 2018

Hello, Wednesday Warriors!

Recently, I experienced a minor crisis. By minor, I mean a tiny little decision, that will truly have a minuscule impact on my future, consumed my mind for a good week and a half. It bothered me so much I even freaked out to a good friend via Facebook messenger. Thankfully, she talked me down and didn't judge me, at least not out loud. (Love you Megan!)

What silly choice threw me into an absurd tizzy? Hair. 

It's amazing how hair can effect the way we feel. Color, texture, culture, horrible cuts from the past, and even Jr. High trauma (I'm not the only one, right?), all contribute to the way we feel about those strands — or lack there of — sprouting from our heads. They can either make us feel to...

November 28, 2018

Hello, Wednesday Warriors! 

Sorry for the late post (I know you were all waiting with bated breath ;-)) but my bandwidth is low today. I'm not walking in the gray of depression or gasp of anxiety, I simply have very little in my tank. Work is very busy, I'm beta reading for someone, planning the spring semester for our church's youth group, and in the final sprint of Nano.

So I'm keeping it short and simple today: how do you replenish when your tank is empty? 

If you have a second, I'd love to know! 

November 21, 2018

Hello, Wednesday Warriors! 

Welcome to the obligatory Thanksgiving post! This time of year, there is an influx of things people are thankful for. Some count their blessings one day at a time, others wait to reflect until the week — or even the day — of, while someone I know changed her twitter handle to different things she was thankful for (brilliant idea Sharon!)

Tonight, I'm heading out to my parents' house to spend a few days with them. We'll eat all of the traditional stuff — turkey, dressing, mashed potatoes, pie, wine — and a few less traditional dishes — broccoli and cheese rice, queso (probably?), then play games. We will also celebrate with a few families from church, a tradition we started a few years ago.

This...

November 14, 2018

Hello, Wednesday Warriors! 

Winter has finally hit Houston! Sort of. For us, this typically means a few days below freezing, followed by another day in the 70's. One day I'm layering up wearing four shirts to my morning boot camp, and the next I'm in a tank top. Weather whiplash at its finest.

This week, we even got snow. I don't have any evidence of this. It came in somewhat apathetic flurries and I only knew of its existence because of the morning show I listen to during the week, but this tiny little phenomenon excited me. Like a little kid, I wanted to run outside, to stick my tongue out, to taste it a la Charlie Brown. This small joy kind of made my entire week.

That's what happens when your city only gets snow every...

November 7, 2018

Not going to lie. It's been a tough week, Wednesday Warriors. A bit of a tough few weeks actually. I'm in what seems to be a never ending battle with anxiety. It strikes in the middle of the most unexpected times, detached, it seems, from any true trigger. This makes it nearly impossible to plan for and to manage. Through some breathing techniques, I've been able to get most of the attacks under control.

However, over the last month or so, my symptoms have shifted. What once worked now makes it worse and chest pain has added itself to the mix. Worried I might have another problem (not anxiety related), I went to a clinic just to be safe. The nurse confirmed my lungs were clear and found only a slightly red throat....

October 31, 2018

Welcome once again Wednesday Warriors and Happy Halloween!

A lot of debate surrounds this candy-filled, costume-covered day. Superstitions surround carved pumpkins (a friend recently told me her pastor gave a sermon on the evils of this particular fruit - I think my friend Sharon would agree, at least, when it comes to pumpkin spice), some individuals lean into the gore far too much for my liking, and graphic horror movies torment my advertisements (thank you Hulu for allowing me to edit what ads I see). But at the end of the day, most of us just want to munch on candy and dress up.

Why do we enjoy dressing up? Maybe it's because it's fun to have a new identity for a couple of hours. Maybe it's just to let our inner creat...

October 24, 2018

Welcome once again Wednesday Warriors!

There is a reason dialogue is not like real life conversation. Punctuated with "umms", "uhs", awkward pauses, and sad attempts at wit (how sweet is it when we actually have that quick response!), no one would want to read an actual day to day conversation. While some might rise above the rest with poignancy as profoundly insightful or amusing hilarity, most are fairly boring.

But dialogue still must sound like something someone would actually say. This isn't always easy and it requires reading it out loud and running it by other people to perfect it. Some of the worst dialogue I've ever read hasn't been in young adult fiction, but rather "romance" scenes in action stories. The almost...

October 17, 2018

Welcome once again Wednesday Warriors!

We are continuing character questionnaires this week. Next on the list is: Are you an optimist, pessimist, or realist? Why or why not?

I tend to be kind of a realist with pessimistic leanings, especially when it comes to conflict, because I think of all possible things that could go wrong! 

What about you? 

If you have a second, I'd love to know! 

October 10, 2018

Welcome once again Wednesday Warriors!

Last week, I started a new set of questions that I'm taking from the character questionnaires I filled out for my new story. You're answers were helpful and some hilarious. Next on the list is displays of affection.

My love language is words of encouragement. I love getting and giving verbal praise. With all the negative communication that gets spewed out on social media, replacing it with positive words (good vibes, anyone?) is more necessary than ever.  

Lowest on my list (at least the last time I took the test), is quality time followed closely by touch.  

So what about you? How do you communicate affection to those around you? How can others best communicate their affecti...

October 3, 2018

Welcome once again Wednesday Warriors!

I'm deep in the trenches of my new story and decided, this time, to fill out questionnaires for my characters. This way, I know how they will react to the plot I throw them into. One of the questions is "What is the first thing they do in the morning?" This, of course, had me wondering about all of you. 

 What is the first thing you do when you wake up? After questioning what year it is and turning off my alarm, I usually head straight for the bathroom to brush my teeth (because ew) and then debate whether or not to sleep five more minutes. Because I get up at four most mornings in order to work out, this usually devolves quickly into an existential about the value of exercise and wh...

October 1, 2018

Our God is a very big God. So big and so creative that a single human never could bear his image perfectly. In his vastness, he uses male and female, black and white, smart and simple, single and married to paint as full a picture as possible of his broad and unsearchable character. In One Blood, Dr. John M. Perkins weaves this truth together with grace and humility, wisdom, and love. He celebrates our ethnic diversity and confronts the sin of racism with both seriousness and gentleness, all the while keeping the gospel of Jesus front and center.

Perkins is a legendary civil rights activist, author, and an evangelical statesman. He is the founder of the famed Voice of Calvary Bible Institute, the Christian Community Deve...

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Welcome!

Here at The Pensive Pen, I blog about writing, querying, and self-publishing my first paranormal academy series. Sometimes I might share about struggling with anxiety and insomnia, and I'll always ask questions to discover something very important to me: getting to know YOU! If you're a writer, reader, or someone trying to figure out what community looks like online, this place is for you!

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